Tea of Requirement

I owe you tea and an explanation. The usual place, Saturday, at four o clock. Please?

-A.M.W.

Well, Lily thought to herself as she scanned the short note, she was right about that.

It had been several days now since the mayhem that had ensued from the Marauders’ party, and Lily had seen neither head nor tail of Alice. It certainly hadn’t been for want of trying. But whenever Lily went to the dorm rooms for the sixth years she had been out, and she must have slipped to and from the common room like a ghost. It wasn’t even as if the redhead could catch her friend’s attention in class where they were in different years; their classes ran on completely different schedules and seemed to clash at the most convenient times. Lily was half wondering if the girl had taken lessons from James on sneaking around the school, as it seemed the only reasonable explanation for how she’d managed to avoid her for so long.

It wasn’t even as if Lily wanting to talk to her was a rare thing. She, Alice and Ted had been having these little meetings for a while now. It was a chance for the three of them to escape the rest of the school, enjoy one another’s company (and Ted’s wonderful cakes of course), and talk about things that they felt were for each other’s ears only. In fact, Lily had been tempted to call one herself after the events of Monday evening. She had wanted to talk through her little indiscretion with James – because that’s how she saw it – with someone she thought she could trust, and that award fell solely to the two of them. However, after the party and Alice’s disappearance, Lily knew that there were more important things to be discussed this time.

She spent the morning working on a dull but necessary Charms assignment that if she’d been honest she easily could have written the morning it was due in and still gotten the best grade in the class – it had always been her best subject. Even for her, however, it had been difficult to concentrate with the meet hanging over her head. At half past three, she readily stashed her things away and headed off to their usual room. Alice had been the one to reveal the room to the group, and Lily had since taken a great liking to it. It seemed to be about the only place in school James Potter couldn’t follow her, and in previous years she’d have lived in there if she’d had the choice.

Lily normally handled some sort of refreshments for the three of them, but in all the anxiety she’d not really even thought. Entering the room empty handed, her eyes landed immediately on Alice sat in the chair she’d adopted some time ago as her own, looking nervous and skittish as a kitten waiting for the fireworks to start. Alice was one of her closest friends, and had been for years. She had been one of the only people who Lily had felt able to cry in front of after the Mudblood incident in her Fifth Year, and who hadn’t simply passed her off with an ‘I told you so’. It was this very relationship that meant she was so frustrated with the younger girl right now, and it showed in her expressionless face and crossed arms as she let the door close behind her.

“Well, it’s nice to know you’ve not fallen off the edge of the earth or joined the masked maniacs’ brigade,” she remarked, bitterness in her tone and stance. She didn’t like being so angry with her friends, but Alice had hurt Lily. She had made her doubt yet another friend, and after Severus she had hardened to such betrayal now. It would not be her again. She sat down in her own chair, settling back into the cushions with her arms still tight across her chest. “No Ted yet, then, I assume?”

Though she missed her fellow Muggle-born’s company, Lily half hoped he might run late today. She and Alice needed to talk, and she didn’t want Ted stuck in the middle feeling like he had to take a side. It wasn’t his argument. It was theirs.

“You’re damn right you did,” Lily snapped as Alice admitted deserving the redhead’s temper. “Where the hell have you been? You disappeared that night, nobody’s seen you. Apparently you were completely unconcerned about the people your new love interest took his wand to – they were fine, by the way – and more interested in avoiding any questions. It’s nice to know where my so-called friend’s priorities lie.”

She wasn’t sure what part of what Alice had done angered her the most. The abandoning of the group to escape at the first given moment, the avoidance of any of them for days on end, the fact that she hadn’t even thought to ask after those that got on the wrong end of a wand. Lily had spent years hating James and Sirius when Alice had tried in vain to defend them, and yet the head girl had been the one there to pick up the pieces and patch them up with Remus afterwards. Then there was the meek way she had chosen to get in touch, an almost anonymous letter left on her pillow. Lily had fought the instinct the scrunch it up and toss it away, she’d been to mad. But now she thought about it, it was none of these things that left Lily almost shaking.

Alice had been her best friend, and now Lily wasn’t sure if she still had one. She had been close to someone before who had switched sides quicker than she could say quaffle, and the betrayal had cut plenty deep enough to leave some emotional scars. She didn’t exactly have trust issues, but she had certainly kept her guard up for a while. Alice and Ted were the two people she felt she didn’t have to be so careful around, and the other girl had thrown that in her face. The thought that yet another of her closest friends was not who they said is what hurt her the most, not because they had lied, but because she’d been stupid enough to believe them.

“Advanced Arithmancy is complicated. The unfathomable filing system in the Restricted Section is complicated. Deserting your friends when they need you the most, that seems like quite a simple choice to me.”

Lily paused her sharp comments as Alice attempted to give an explanation. She deserved the one chance to explain herself, but it was the only chance she would be given, so Lily hoped she made good use of it. When she mentioned her brother, Lily had to admit she could see why Alice might have been scared. He was only thirteen years old, and if whoever had done this to Gamp truly was only acting to get to her family as Alice suggested, it was possible her family were on the same list. Still, she found it hard to summon sympathy. Lily had been dealing with verbal, physical and magical attacks from those cretins for years, and would never even dream of running off while the people she claimed to acre about were in trouble. It wasn’t in her nature to back down or step aside, and it never would be as long as she had any say about it.

As the younger girl revealed her plan, Lily’s face went from steely to disbelief. Sirius had spoken to Alice and not said anything? And he’d known she’d been considering this idea? She would be having serious words with him. He could be as reckless and foolhardy as he wanted, but he couldn’t expect everyone else in Gryffindor to act the same out of some misguided sense of loyalty. Everyone would have their own way of dealing with this situation. They didn’t all have to go running off guns blazing. Besides, had she not thought through what pretending to be one of them meant?

“Are you insane or just incredibly stupid all of a sudden?” Lily asked, her voice low a quiet. She found it was often more intimidated than her shouting, but right now is was a natural change. “If you pretend to join up with that lot, the first thing they’re going to want from you is proof that you believe, and it won’t be as easy to convince them as just calling me a Mudblood in public.” She still winced at the word, but carried on seamlessly. “They’ve already gone for someone completely innocent, so who’s next? Sirius is the biggest blood traitor around; does he deserve the next lesson? Maybe they’ll get you to attack Hufflepuff’s new resident protector, hm? Or maybe they’ve got so sick of a Muggle-born witch telling them what to do, they’ll ask you to put me out of action for a few days, or weeks. You’ve been mine and Ted’s friend for years. Do you really think we won’t be the first people they jump to so they can be convinced themselves you’ll fall in line without question?”

Alice wasn’t a stupid girl. How had she not considered this? The Pureblood fanatics needed people to be loyal, and that meant cutting all ties with anyone who was even slightly in doubt. She couldn’t imagine how Alice thought this was in any way, shape, or form a good diea. It would only lead to more trouble, and Lily simply would not have it. Damn it, she was head girl. She was meant to be protecting her friends, protecting the school and it’s students, and the first attack on a student in decades had come under her watch. She would not let the school dissolve into chaos, and her friends would not be a part of it.

“Could you do it, Alice, if they told you? Could you raise your wand on Ted, or me? Could you put us in the Hospital Wing without blinking an eye?”

Alice brought up her previous experience with guys, and Lily felt herself soften slightly. The redhead herself had only ever had one bloke in the school show her the sort of attention Alice was talking about, but that was still one more than her friend. She could imagine getting carried away, had she been in the same position. However, in Lily’s mind it was still no excuse for running. Gryffindors were meant to be brave and bold, and she certainly fell into that category. She had never backed down from an argument or fight – had occasionally started a few herself – and her pride wouldn’t ever allow her to take what she saw as the coward’s way out. She had thought more of Alice than that, and felt anger mix with a bitter disappointment at her excuse. It just wasn’t enough.

“Sure. He was the only guy in school to ever look twice at you. I can see why that would take precedence over a friend that’s stuck by your side for the past, what, four, five years?”

Anger clearly wasn’t working. Perhaps guilt would be a better way to go. Not just guilt, but honesty. Lily could vividly remember Alice slipping her arm away and scurrying off into the crowds, leaving her stood there bewildered as to where she was escaping to. It hurt her to think that since she had lost her weight and thrown herself into staying healthy with her running that grabbing the attention of a boy was now more important than spending time with her. Lily would never dream of abandoning her friends for a boy. Even when she had been close to Severus she had made time for Alice, Ted, and Mary. How was she supposed to say that though? Lily doubted Alice realised quite how difficult it was to be this angry with your best friend.

As the future was speculated on, Lily quietened, turning inwards in thought as she leaned forward to pour herself a cup of tea, her hands trembling slightly as she lifted the cup to blow the liquid cool before taking a sip. She needed to calm herself down, and as stereotypical as it was tea always soothed her. This had snuck up on all of them. Lily wouldn’t be able to forgive herself if another student went missing or worse, and she’d been the cause of it. She’d already beaten herself up about delaying the search for Gamp with Sirius, Remus and James. If they’d only gotten out a couple of minutes earlier, was there something they could have seen or done to change what had happened? They would never know now. But what they could do was take measures to stop a repeat event, and to do that they needed information from somewhere; information that couldn’t be learned from a textbook. God, they were so young to be dealing with this.

“Compliments won’t get you off the hook for this,” she scorned with a frown, before sighing and sitting back into her chair, “but I guess you’re right. There’s no way we can do anything without knowing what their plans are. There’s no way they’d believe Sirius has switched back to their side after the fight, or James. They wouldn’t believe Remus, and Peter’s about as much use as a chocolate teapot in situation like this.”

Her eyes turned to the ceiling in thought as she took another long sip of her drink, concentrating on calming herself. The last thing she wanted to do was fall out with her best friend when what she was suggesting was as good a course of action as any. That didn’t mean Lily had to like it. If she could have put herself forward she would have in a second, but she could have been an award winning actress and the people behind this still wouldn’t have taken her in. They needed a Pureblood, someone who could believably have switched sides, and of their group that role landed solely in Alice’s territory, and she was stepping up to the mark. Perhaps it had been harsh of Lily to think of her as being cowardly. It would take a lot of nerve to go through with this.

“If it was me, anyone that tried to touch the people I cared about would be in St. Mungo’s for the rest of their lives.”

It was rare for Lily so say anything so drastic, but her tone was deadly serious. Her eyes were like steel as she brought them back to Alice. It wasn’t anger with the girl now, though, but the determination in her voice. Lily would lay down her life for the people she loved. She didn’t know why she had thought anyone else would be different.

“We would have to keep as few people from knowing as possible. The risk of people slipping up is too much when it’s you in the firing line if anything goes wrong. That means you, Sirius, me, and whoever they tell you to go for if it’s someone else. People’s reactions have to be believable, and the best way to do that is if they really think you’ve switched sides.”

If they did decide to single her out, Lily thought, that would also mean keeping James in the dark. She dreaded to think how he might react if Alice did have to turn her wand on the redhead. Sirius would know and hold him back, she had no doubt, but after their conversation the other night she’d seen things in him that made her worry. It was insane to even be considering this, but what other choice did they have? Lily was the goody two shoes, and even she knew it would be no good going to professors at this point. There was already talk of the school closing.

“I won’t let anyone else get hurt under my watch. I’m Head Girl, Alice, and two weeks into my run a girl’s gone missing, a serious duel has broken out and they’re seriously discussing closing the school if anything more happens. I won’t let my time here be remembered that way. I’m better than that. We’re better than that.”